[Just for fun] My delivery has not arrived yet, when will it arrive?

So get this, people!

I went to my computer and  ordered an item on Amazon (it was a personal massager and a bucket of lube),



and it said delivery within 7 days of purchase,




I clicked buy all happy and content, then I went to bed.



I woke up the next morning... and get this ...

I DID NOT RECEIVE MY PACKAGE!!

I had to go online to complain about the package not being delivered!



They told me about 7 Days or something ... I didnt quite listen, so I went to bed



I wake up the next morning, and guess what?! NO FU*KING PACKAGE YET!



This is absurd, it says within 7 days and its not day 7 yet but its day 3 and no package, how can this be? Am I missing something?



I cannot function, I cannot sleep, I cannot eat, I MUST have it! Please share your experiences.

/Parody